Kelly Clarkson is the devil...

Originally posted on 04/26/05, but I'm reposting here...

Bill came over one Sunday for some odd reason that I can't really remember. That's not important. What is important is that we were listening to the radio at the time. The Kelly Clarkson song, "Since You've Been Gone" came on the radio. If you don't know, Kelly Clarkson was the first winner of American Idol and this is the second single off of her second album, Breakaway.

So we were talking about how the song isn't bad and kind of catchy when Bill asks, "Hey, have you seen the video for this song?"

If you haven't seen the video for "Since You've Been Gone", which if you’re someone like my Mom, then I can perfectly understand why you haven't, the premise of the video is that Kelly Clarkson walks around her ex-boyfriend's apartment while cutting up clothes, destroying things and just generally trashing the place. As she leaves, the boyfriend walks up to the apartment with his new girlfriend all none the wiser that Kelly has just committed several felonies such as breaking and entering and vandalism.

"Yeah, I've seen it," I say. "What about it?"

"Don't you think it sets a bad example?"

"In what way?" I ask.

"She destroys stuff in her ex-boyfriends apartment and leaves."

"And?" I ask.

"It sets a bad example because kids may think that this type of behavior is OK."

I kind of smirk and say, "Yeah, I know what you mean because there's this video where Avril Lavigne leaves painted marks all over town, which is vandalism, and they have an impromptu concert in the middle of a busy intersection, which is disturbing the peace."

"Oh, shut up!" Bill yells. "You always do this!"

"Do what?"

"You twist things I say!"

"Because I don't think that what you just said makes sense," I say. "It's just a video, Bill. It's not like kids are going to watch it and copy it."

"They might."

I thought about it a minute and thought about stopping the conversation and keeping quiet. I couldn't help myself. I had to keep this going.

"That's true," I said. "There's this video by Twisted Sister where the father is blown out the window by a guitar rock chord..."

"Oh shuuut up!" Bill exclaims with rolled eyes.

"Bob!" my wife, Laura, yells from the kitchen.

"turns into Dee Snyder," I continue, "and drags his father down the stairs by his hair."

"You think that you're funny, but your not," Laura says.

"Oh come one!" I exclaim. "You have to admit that it's funny!"

Laura says, "This is funny for one person, you."

Bill says, "You really are reaching."

"Reaching! You're the one that's insisting that Kelly Clarkson's corrupting the youths of America."

"Keep reaching!" he shakes his head and rolls his eyes.

Bill sighs, "I can see that this is going to end up on your blog."

"Damn right it's ending up on my blog! It's a stupid argument."

Nothing is said for a minute. I'm sitting there with a smirk on my face. I'm trying to think of a good comeback. Bill's scowling because he knows that I'm trying to think of a good comeback.

I raise my finger to speak. Bill sighs again. "There's another video by Avril Lavigne..."

Laura yells from the kitchen, "Robert! Let it go!"

"In which she walks down the street..."

"You just can't help yourself," Bill says with distaste.

"No I can't," I laugh and finish quickly, "and then shoves a guy in a bar...

"Robert!" Laura yells again and glares.

I laugh and say, "I'm done."

"Good." Bill says.

Bill leaves and I ask Laura, "You can't possibly agree with him can you?"

"No, but I just didn't want hear you two argue. It wasn't worth arguing over."

"It was funny," I said.

"Only to you," she says. I snicker.

Hours later, I call Bill up on his cell phone and say, "Bill, there's this one video by Jane's Addiction called "Been Caught Stealing where they opening mock the laws against shoplifting and encourage people to steal. It sets a bad example."

Bill sighs and asks, "It took you all day to come up with that lame comeback?"

"Pretty much," I chuckled.